Here is the Christmas Newsletter We Sent Out this Year

We hope this letter finds you and your entire family joyful with the spirit of anticipation this Advent season as we await the coming of our Lord! Life at Nashotah House has been keeping both Philip and I busy with a conglomeration of holiday festivities, chapel services and community events—not to mention all the school work Philip has to complete before the end of the semester. Yet, through it all we have found it beneficial to fully participate in this season of Advent as we develop our own traditions as a family and celebrate and reflect with amazement on Christ’s incarnation as a tiny little baby.

We can’t believe that it was just this past summer when we shoved all of our belongings into our small hatchback and drove across the country to Nashotah, Wisconsin where Philip is finishing his last year of seminary. It seems like such a short time ago when we first pulled into our parking space at Sheridan 4C on the Nashotah campus. Our car was so full that it looked like a water balloon ready to burst! In no time we were unpacked, Philip began classes, and I started working as a teller at a local bank. Since then our weeks have been so full of activities that it is no wonder the time has passed quickly. Before we knew it, snowflakes began to flood the yard with piles of fluff while icicles started forming sculptures on our window panes. This winter sure has been a chilly one!

Philip’s school schedule keeps him moving from morning prayer at 8am until evening prayer at 4:30pm with classes and study in between, after which he is able to come home and relax just long enough to eat dinner and return to the library or his study in our frigid basement for an evening of reading Church History or writing papers for Liturgy I and II. Praise God his days of Greek and Hebrew are over!

My evenings are quite full as well. After returning home from work, usually around 6pm, I seem to have some sort of activity to fill my evenings every night of the week! Mondays I lead a women’s prayer group in our home, Tuesdays I have begun attending training classes for the Order of St. Luke, which is a healing prayer ministry. On Wednesday nights we have about eight vibrant and talkative teenagers pile on our couch, eat snacks and interrupt one another as they tell us all about their weeks for close to an hour, leaving about thirty minutes for us to teach them about coming Sunday’s gospel lesson. Thursday evenings there is a family Eucharist in St. Mary’s Chapel on campus which is usually followed by some other social event, and Friday evenings we have been hosting bon-fires outside our home to build community with our neighbors. And believe it or not, our weekends are just as crazy! Philip is filling in as pastor every other Sunday at a small parish of elderly folks and we are also participating in the Sunday evening contemporary service on campus. As you can see, life in Wisconsin has left us little time for relaxation, but God has been sustaining us and we are blessed to be a part of such a spiritually enriching community!

Next semester has a lot in store for us as well. Right after Christmas Philip will be taking the General Ordination Exam which is a four day process that will test him on what he has learned over the past two and a half years in seminary. The exam covers topics such as theology, church history, spiritual formation, liturgy and pastoral care. He is busy preparing for that on top of all his studies. After the exam is complete, Philip will load into a minivan with half a dozen other volunteers and travel down to New Orleans to assist the area still suffering from the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina. Sadly I will not be able to join him.

When he returns, he will begin his final semester of seminary! However, once again his school responsibilities will be joined by a variety of other tasks like meeting with the Standing Committee, starting the deployment process with the Diocese of Central Florida and, assuming everything falls into place, preparing for ordination to the deaconate! We are really excited and overwhelmed, hardly believing that our three years of seminary are coming to a close!

As for myself, after a lot of prayer and discernment, we have decided that I will leave my job at the bank a little earlier than planned in order to give myself ample time to complete my Master’s thesis project. So next semester I will be spending a majority of my time in the library and interviewing as many people as I can to develop curriculum for a women’s bible study based on a theology and spirituality of the human body. This is a topic that God has placed on my heart and I am eager to develop it into both a spiritual discipline and a tool to help others integrate their bodies into their spiritual lives.

Well, that’s all for now! We hope that your lives are being filled to the measure with the complete love of Christ as we rejoice in his coming! If you are already receiving Philip’s email newsletter updates, “A Month in the Life of a Seminarian”
and would like to be put on that mailing list, send him an email.

Thank you for all your love, prayers and support. We are blessed to have you as a part of our lives and we could not have gotten to where we are today without your encouragement and prayers.

The Lord be With You,
Philip and Melissa

A Church Visit

Today I visited Mamre Moravian Church, a denomination with a rich history within the pre-reformational pietistic movement. As I stepped out of the vehicle the first thing that I noticed about the church was that the entire building focused the viewers eyes upward until the view culminated at the steeple. I walked in and noticed the old wooden pews in a simple square shaped room surrounded by simple picture windows. Next my eyes noticed a very large box shaped pipe organ which took up the entire front right hand corner of the front of the church. Apparently the church had not been designed with an organ in mind. In the center was a pulpit flanked by two picture windows, one of of the Scriptures and another of two stone tablets. Above the pulpit hung a multi-pointed white star (which I later learned is supposed to communicate a symbol of diversity).

The service was led by a young lay member in his fifties and assisted by an organist. Attendance on that Sunday was twenty-one, however from what I understand there are normally less than twelve, the youngest of which is in his seventies.

The sermon went well. The guest preacher confidently began with a funny story about himself and continued in an organized and interesting fashion. The only part of the sermon that I thought was a might bit disconcerting was that each time he finished a main point of the homily, his voice tone and length of pause was such that I thought it was the end of his sermon, and then he would continue.

After the service was complete everyone went into a side room, and sat down around a couple of tables for coffee, brownies, cookies and conversation. There was lots of reminiscing amidst the dialogue, as well as friendly chatter and questions as to where I was from and the like. Everyone was very welcoming.

After the service I walked around through the grass around behind the church to use the outhouse. The church has no indoor plumbing of which I am aware. It was a two-seater, which I thought interesting. Curious how our culture has changed over the years since this outhouse was first built.

My visit left me wondering, what is it that keeps these rich and heartwarming folks returning to this pretty, but dwindling church, week after week with such dedication?

Mom's Suprise Birthday

We had a great time at Melissa's Mom's suprise birthday party down in Florida this past summer.

Visiting with Dad in Florida

We had a fun time visiting Melissa's dad and family while we were down in Florida a few weeks ago.

Biking with the Family

Out deep woods biking with the family back in Michigan about a month ago (late August).

Climbing the Tower

While we were at Holy Hill, Melissa and I took the opportunity to climb to the top of the tower which was a few hundred steps up into the air.



Somewhat tiring, however the view at the top was very pretty

A Visit to Holy Hill

Last Sunday (October 7th), Melissa and I visited The Basilica of the National Shrine of Mary, Help of Christians, Holy Hill. Apparently this is a national pilgrimage sight and is considered very holy. It is one of the highest spots in Wisconsin and has a rich history that reaches back into the sixteen hundreds when Jesuit missionaries first came to this country. People go there for a variety of different reasons, though I thought it was interesting how many people had been healed there. One of the walls beside a small chapel had leaning up against it numerous crutches and even a blue leg cast that had apparently been cut off the person's leg while he or she was visiting the place. I was suprised by how many people were there. There were hundreds and hundreds of cars, along with multiple parking lots and people directing traffic telling us where to park.

Curiously the advertising did not clearly show that the site was Roman Catholic, though I immediately knew it was Roman, as I assume other do since it is a shrine of Mary. The advertising on the website was clear as were the listed times for mass, confession and a variety of other services.

The inside of the basilica was in excellent condition. I felt like I was in another world upon entering inside of what appeared from the outside to be a rough and dark and foreboding old building. The inside of the building appeared bright and massive with high arching ceilings that seemed to reach into the heavens. Light shone all around the artistically arranged lightly colored stone walls and beautifully painted windows. I felt as though I were being drawn toward the front of the building where the stone was arranged as if the paintings above the rerodos were bursting from the wall.

The characters leading the service were very sparse and consisted of a celebrant and someone I assume was a deacon since he carried the gospel book in the procession, though he was not dressed like a deacon. There was also an organist up on the balcony. The service was a weekly Eucharistic service (taking communion, for my more Protestant friends) which used a paperback missal and hymnal. The building was very full. There were probably about ten people or more per pew which would have totaled over a thousand people in the building attending the mass.

Welcome, was not a feeling that I would describe our experience. Melissa and I felt more like tourists which was fine since that’s what we expected at the shrine. No one greeted us on the way in, but when we slipped out while everyone else was going up for communion we received some very warm smiles and handshakes from some of the ushers as we headed out the door. The pre-service atmosphere was noisy: cell phones many people talking and people walking about the building to their seats. A few folks were kneeling to pray, though most were sitting and waiting or moving to their seats.

The service began when a very old man went to the lectern and said in a quiet, echoing voice that was very difficult to decipher, something about welcoming us to the Basilica, the intention of the Mass and a reminder to turn off our cell phones and the page number of the processional hymn. That is as close as I can come to exact wording. Due to the horrible sound quality and acoustics, the service was not easy to follow. I have, but a small amount of familiarity with the Roman Missal and was able to find a majority of the correct pages so that I could comfortably and securely follow the service, however this would have been very difficult for someone that was completely new to a Roman Catholic service. I would never even think about introducing someone to the historic liturgy of the church (such as a member of my very Evangelical family) at this service. After these initial announcements a hymn began and an old man wearing a light colored suit and a very small cross led the supposed deacon (same guy who had given the announcements, apparently had moved to the back of the room) who was wearing a black cassock and surplice and carrying the gospel high up in the air, followed by the celebrant who was wearing a green chasuble and wearing a headset type of microphone (the one that wraps around the ear and comes up along one’s cheek).

The greatest distraction at the church was the horrible sound quality both of the music, the readings and the homily. Interestingly, I was not distracted by the folks walking in and out of the side chapels during the service. The people movements off to the side seemed so tiny in comparison to the expanse of the building. The worship was muffled. During a majority of the service seemed as if everyone mumbled quietly through the service because they weren’t sure exactly what to say and did not know the hymns very well and so everyone was afraid to say anything with firm believe or confidence The only part of the service in which the congregation seemed some what assertive was in saying the Lord’s Prayer.

I assume that the service was about an hour and fifteen minutes or so. Melissa and I left just before everyone was about to go up for communion and by then the service had gone on for over forty-five minutes and I assume that it was going to take a while to communicate over a thousand people.

The sermon began fifteen minutes into the service and went for about half an hour. There were no announcements during the service and the peace lasted for but a few moments. On a scale of ten the preacher was somewhere between a five and six. During the beginning of the sermon he followed the lectionary reading from the Gospel and spoke about faith as Jesus had compared it to a mustard seed. Within the first fifteen minutes he had moved from the lectionary reading to speaking about the need for continual forgiveness. However for a majority of his sermon he spoke of the founding of our country on Christian principles and the sanctity of life as opposed to abortion. I found this very odd and was confused at the topical disparity. I am still confused as to how he managed to bring these completely different focuses together.

For me, the part of the service which was like being in another place was in the beginning before the service began, while I was taking in all of the beauty and wonderment of the heavenly space and exquisite artistry.

After the service we went to the gift shop and I bought Melissa a crucifix necklace for her birthday which is tomorrow (October 8th). I would not want to make this church my regular home. It was a fun place to visit. That is all.

As we drove away from the Basilica I wondered how anyone would be willing to give such a large amount of money to create such an incredibly beautiful building simply to have such awful performed services within it. The one think that I will think about all this week hence is why so many thousands of people would be drawn to a place with such poor churchmanship. Is it the holiness of the sight? The mystical nature of the place? The beauty of it all? The healings that have taken place there? The great connection with God that has been experienced by so many pilgrims at the sight? Some things to think about.

Melissa's Birthday

Melissa had a fun twenty-fifth birthday with some friends of ours from the seminary at the Texas Roadhouse this past Saturday. Afterward we went back to the campus for cake and a bonfire.

September - A Month in the Life of a Seminarian

Greetings,
I've entered into a whole new world here at Nashotah House Theological Seminary: cassocks, morning and evening prayer, classes and work-crew. I normally rise about six o'clock to either run or lift weights, shower, read my Bible, pray and then stuff my books and computer into my bag, hop onto my bike at about ten to eight and ride off to chapel. After arriving, I quickly grab my cassock off of the hook, pull it on and walk to my assigned seat. The inside of the historic chapel is amazing to behold. The many surrounding statues of biblical characters, martyrs and bishops remind me that I am not worshiping alone, but am joined by a great cloud of witnesses. My mind wanders a bit as we all sit in silence and then suddenly the bell begins to ring and the sounds of creaking pews and feet against the wooden floor, swells throughout the room as we all rise for the service and make the most ancient of Christian symbols, the sign of the cross, remembering that we are crucified with Christ. The service has begun.

About an hour later, I and my classmates rush off to breakfast and then to class. I have a busy schedule which consists of a two liturgy classes in which I am learning how Christians have gathered together throughout history to worship God and commune with him; a class on the history of the Anglican church which is extremely and intriguing; ethics and moral theology taught by a Thomas Aquinas scholar; church music, in which we learn about how the church has used music throughout its history and also how to read music and to sing chants; and parish ministry, which is a class on how to be a pastor. During the afternoon I'm busy either with my studies, choir practice or work crew. The seminary follows a model which was established by a monk named St. Benedict back in the sixth century, in which he required his monks to follow a rule which separated the day into prayer, work and study. At four-thirty we gather again in the chapel for evening prayer and then I hope on my bike to arrive back at our apartment for supper with Melissa and then homework. The days here are very full.

Melissa has been hard at work. Within a few days of our move to Wisconsin, she was out and about applying for jobs. She went to nearly every bank in town and almost all of them called her back for an interview and then offered her the job. (My wife's a pretty amazing woman!) She finally accepted one of the positions only to have another bank call her a few hours later and offer her more money. It was a tempting choice, but because she had given her word and decided to remain at the bank where she had originally accepted a position. Since then she's been moving quickly up the ranks and will soon have senior teller status. I'm quite proud of her.

We've also been quite busy within the Seminary community. I tried out and was accepted into the choir and I have also obtained a job at the library where I'll be working for a couple of hours a week. Melissa and I have been given the opportunity to lead the youth ministry here on campus and have been having fun getting to know the young students. We've also been making lots of friends and have begun gathering folks together for a bonfire every Friday night. Oh, yes, before I forget, Melissa's birthday is coming soon (October 8th - the big two-five). She would love to here from you if you have a few minutes

Thank you for all of your prayers. My experience here at Nashotah has been very formational for me as I continue to follow God's leading. I know that this is where I am supposed to be. I mentioned in one of my letters that Melissa and I were going to be doing some fundraising because our finances were quite tight (we moved here with nearly no money, trusting that if it were God's will, he would provide) and we have been pleasantly surprised. Though not many people have yet responded, we are amazed at the generosity of those who have and we are very thankful for those folks who are prayerfully partnering with us in advancing God's kingdom; we are seeing and experiencing the fruit of your prayers everyday.

Feel free to write to us and let us know how you're doing. Melissa and
I miss all of you.

Life in Wisconsin

OUR FIRST ADVENTURE
“Where could she be?” I asked myself while glancing at the clock which read in bold digital letters: 3:30 am. We had made it safely to Nashotah, Wisconsin, barely moved into our new apartment and now my wife was missing. Quite the scare, as I experienced it. Earlier that evening we had joined the seminary community for a Texas style barbeque. Toward the end of the night only about a dozen people were left, sitting around a bonfire. I left to go to bed, but Melissa stayed. I woke up a few hours later and noticed that she still wasn’t by my side.

I looked out the window to the field where the fire had been. Nothing. I looked in the bathroom and then downstairs in the living room. I began calling her on my nearly signal-less cell phone. Nothing, no answer. My stomach was now feeling tight, as I wondered what possibly could have happened to her.

I called my voice mail to see if she had left a message and sure enough, I hear: “Hello Babe, it’s 1:30 am and I’m locked out of the house.” “Locked out of the house?” I thought to myself, “We never lock the door. Did she go to the wrong door since all of the apartments are identical?” (I later discovered that when I swung the door open earlier, it had smacked up against the wall, pushing the button which locks the door, unbeknownst to me).

Though I still didn’t know where she was, I assumed that a neighbor took her in. My mind began to whir. “What is Melissa thinking of me? What are all of the folks at the bonfire thinking about me, a husband who locks his wife out of the house?” I walked into the bathroom and noticed her cell phone lying on the floor. “That’s why she isn’t answering.” I thought as I picked up the pink phone and flipped it open. I called back the most recent missed call. A woman answered the phone with a voice that sounded as if she was trying to be very quiet. “Is this my wife?” I asked. It was and a few minutes later she was home from our neighbor’s apartment. We were both happy to see each other.

While I was sleeping she had tried everything to get into the apartment. Even walking around back and attempting to climb onto our overhanging deck which was a good seven feet off of the ground. She borrowed a step ladder from one of the woman at the bonfire, climbed up, grabbed the rails and managed to pull herself over. As you know, Melissa wouldn’t exactly describe herself as an athletic or agile person and she was very proud that she was able to accomplish this James Bond like maneuvering, all while wearing a dress. Mixed with laughter, it was a great bonding moment for them. Yet, the patio door too, was locked. Now, how was she to get down? “I guess you’ll have to jump” the woman said. And so, with great fear, that’s what she did.

Eventually, after all attempts failed she ended up sleeping on the woman’s couch until we reconnected at 3:30 am. Neither of us obtained much sleep that night, though it was a fun adventure to share with everyone the following morning.

OUR CROSS COUNTRY TRIP (plus a few zigzags)
All else is going well. Our over packed car brought us safely out of New England, across the country, all of the way to the cheese state. During our journey we stayed with folks in three separate states. First with some friends in New York who had just had a baby, then camping with my family, followed by a two night jaunt in Detroit with Melissa’s sister. Next we flew to Florida for a surprise party for Melissa’s mom; back to Michigan for a few more days, a go-away party and then on the road to Wisconsin, well except for a stop in Chicago to have lunch with my brother. Finally we arrived at Nashotah, Wisconsin and followed the signs to Nashotah House Theological Seminary. We had reached our destination.

SETTLING IN
The past few weeks have been full of orientation sessions, unpacking boxes, and new classes however we are very excited about how welcoming and friendly everyone has been. Most folks spend a good deal of time outdoors: sitting on lawn chairs, watching children, and bonfires nearly every night. On Sunday Melissa and I decided to walk across the campus to join in on a softball game to which we had been invited. The walk would normally have taken about ten minutes, but our stops to say hi to folks along the way extended our journey to half an hour. We feel very blessed by God to have been led to this community of believers and we are excited about our time here.

July - A Month in the Life of a Seminarian

Greetings, I hope that you're doing well. I can hardly believe how fast the summer has fled on by. My internship at the hospital as a chaplain is now over and has been formative for me. God has been hard at work. When folks ask what I've been learning I usually say, "It's really helping me to be less of an idiot, ya know?" And its, true! I remember in particular an emergency room visit with a thin older woman, lying upon a propped up movable bed with a thin cotton blanket tucked around her, stopping just above the waist. Her curled thin white hair had been apparently well styled that morning and set above a slightly clenched, deeply wrinkled, petite face which matched her small body. Her skin was pale, though not sickly, but appeared as one who spent much of her time indoors. A flap of her shirt hung open exposing part of the right side of her upper chest and revealed a cord that ended in a circular sensor of some type held firmly to her skin.

I walked in and softly introduced myself as the chaplain while standing to the left side of her bed, and asked permission to sit down and visit. The woman went on to tell me about the lung mass that the doctors had discovered that day and of her fear that she would die the same horrible death of lung cancer through which she had recently watched her brother. She said that she wished that she would have gotten hit by a truck rather than to die in this way. As I sat beside her bed I felt her pain and fear of the future and with the intention to help her look at the bright side, I foolishly said, "Maybe the mass is not cancerous." At which she replied with angry frustration, "Oh, come on, what do you think it is? I'm not stupid. I know what it is." I quickly realized that I was attempting to fix her sadness by offering the "bright side" rather than being with her in this difficult emotion. Later I remembered the Apostle Paul's writing "weep with those who weep"(Romans 12:15). The visit went on as she shared and I listened. At the end of our visit I rested my hand softly on top of hers and she placed her other hand on top of mine and I prayed that God would bring comfort to her pain and that He would be with her throughout this time as long or short as it might be.

Little by little, from each patient I visit, from my fellow interns, supervisor, and others I have continued to practice and learn how to truly empathize and listen. This has been a tremendous lesson for me this summer and has helped not only in my ministry as a chaplain, but in my friendships and in my marriage.

Friday was my last day of the internship and today, Melissa and I are going to be driving away from Massachusetts to begin the trek which will eventually lead us to Wisconsin where I am planning to complete the last year of my Masters of Divinity degree. It has been somewhat difficult saying goodbye to the friends that we have made during the past few years here. Over the past couple of weeks we have been having dinners and eating ice-cream together with a multiplicity of people in an attempt to see everyone one last time in order to say goodbye before we leave.

We are thoroughly looking forward to the next month to relax, visit family and friends, and reflect on our time in Massachusetts. Melissa is looking forward to finishing up her last couple of classes on-line, diving into community life at Nashotah and having some extra time to pray and discern where God is leading her in her spiritual journey. She will also be looking for a job over the next few weeks, so please keep her in your prayers, that God will open doors for good relationships and a pleasant working environment.

The other day I received news that I'd received a three-thousand dollar scholarship that I had searched, discovered and applied for a few months back. Melissa and I were thrilled, since our budget for the next year is, well, how do you say it, short?...very short? As you know, schooling will hurriedly run a person's savings down! However, little by little as he always has, God is providing. The parish with whom we've been working, commissioned us last Sunday and presented us with a small check as has my sponsoring parish down in Florida and a few individuals who have been following our journey. We're also planning on doing some fundraising and we have always been amazed at the generosity of the people of God once they know the need. It's a huge privilege to be in the midst of God's work. Though future is uncertain, we trust that God will provide.

We are continually amazed from where God has brought us and where he is leading us to. We are excited to continue on the path he has prepared for us and are thankful that you have allowed us to share our journey with you.

Arrayah Zoe Ilyeen Mayer

The letter I read today at her memorial service . . .

Dear Arrayah,

I first found out about you late last year. Your Aunt Melissa was on the phone with your grandmother and had mentioned to me that when she asked how your parents were doing, your grandmother had a happy glint in her voice as if she knew something. Your Aunt Melissa asked if perhaps your mom was pregnant, but your grandmother wouldn't say. After getting off of the phone your Aunt Melissa turned to me and said, "I think Kaley is pregnant and I think it’s a girl." "What? Nah I said. That can't be." But it was and in a short while I received the news from your very happy father. A few months later your older brother Jesiah celebrated his first birthday. I've only had the opportunity of seeing him a few times, but I think you would have enjoyed having him as an older brother.

Months went by and we thought and prayed for you and your family. Then in April I received a phone call and discovered that your mom wasn't doing so well and so she had to go into the hospital for a couple of weeks. I know that this was a difficult time for your family, but they were willing to do anything to take care of you and your mom. We could already tell that they loved you very much and your Aunt Melissa and I began to grow in our love for you also. We thought and prayed for you and your mom quite often now. A few weeks later your mom was doing better and they let her go home from the hospital, with which news I'm sure she was very excited and I bet that you probably felt her happiness from inside her stomach. Yet she still had to go into the hospital every day for check-ups. This took many hours, but we all knew that your mom and dad loved you very much and so it wasn't too many hours for them.

Our spring semester of school at our seminary had just ended and your Aunt Melissa and I were sitting in a pizza restaurant out in Cape Cod where we were staying to celebrate our second anniversary when we received the call announcing your birth. A big smile came across my face. Your Aunt Melissa saw my face and she knew. We were very happy for you, but concerned because some of the doctors were worried about you. I had never had a niece before and we were very happy and we continued to pray for you.

The next day your Aunt Melissa and I had just finished biking a tiring backwoods trail to the ocean and back, on our tandem bike and we were sitting on a bench, resting and looking out over the landscape when my phone rang. It was your grandmother. I asked how you were doing and after a moment of silence your grandmother said, "We gave her back to Jesus." "You gave her back?" I said. "Yes." she said. We cried.

She said that your whole family, even your brother, your grandparents, and some of your aunts and uncles had all gathered together and to hold you and to say goodbye. But your Aunt Melissa and I weren't able to be there. We weren't able to say goodbye. And so now we do. Goodbye Arrayah. Goodbye. Though we never got to see you we are sure that you were very beautiful and all the problems you had could not stop God from revealing himself through a child who never uttered a word. Not a pulpit, not a sleek presentation, not a best selling book, but in a four pound seven ounce girl with Triploidy disease, God found great pleasure in taking a lowly thing in the eyes of the world to show truth.

So today we celebrate. Arrayah you are well. And although we miss you more than we can express, we're only separated by our time here on earth. See you soon niece.

With much love from your Uncle and Aunt,
Philip and Melissa

“But Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven" (ESV Matthew 19:14).

April - A Month in the Life of a Seminarian

It has been a busy month since Melissa and I last wrote. Our spring semester of school has been successfully finished and Melissa and I have plans to travel down to Cape Cod to celebrate our second anniversary (which was actually April 23rd), so we are looking forward to that.

Our exciting month began with an incredible Holy Week at our church, especially the Triduum service which consists of Maundy Thursday (Jesus last meal with his disciples), Good Friday, and the Great Vigil of Easter (Easter actually begins at Sundown on Saturday since according to the Jewish calendar the day ends and another begins at sundown). Beginning on Thursday, midway through the service the lights begin to dim, the songs become slow and sad and the mood somber, rather like a funeral. The priests wear black. There are many periods of silence. The readings are those of Christ's passion: his capture while praying in the garden and then on Friday, his crucifixion. Christ is dead and a sinking heavy feeling comes upon you throughout the day. It is as if you are experiencing Christ's suffering along with him. With this atmosphere and emotion the Easter Vigil begins on Saturday, in complete darkness. However, about midway through the service as the church begins to fill with candle light, Easter begins. After suffering through these mournful, wearisome, and solemn services (of which the church has been packed every night since Thursday) we can hardly await the words of the priest as he shouts three times, "Alleluia! Christ is risen!" and we all shout back, "The Lord is risen indeed! Alleluia!" Suddenly, a great change comes upon the room. All the lights are now on as bright as possible. Everyone is crying, yelling and screaming in celebration. Christ is risen! Energy is pulsating through the room like you've never felt before as people pull bells out of their coats, purses and bags and began shaking and ringing them with all of their might. You are now yelling in excitement as loud as you can, but you cannot hear yourself. The room is filled with sounds of worshippers bellowing and singing at the top of their lungs praises to God. Hands are raised and everyone is whistling and shouting and crying all at the same time. Alleluia! Christ is risen!

A week later, we boarded a plane and flew down to Florida to go before the Commission on Ministry for an emotionally tumultuous weekend in the ordination process. I, along with six others, would go before a group of about twenty to thirty clergy and laypeople who would say to me after the weekend, "Yes, we affirm your calling to the priesthood and encourage you to continue the process." Or "No, we do not think that you are called to be a priest." My destiny, I felt was in there hands. The weekend retreat is called BACAM, which stands for the Bishop's Advisory Counsel on Aspirants for Ministry. It is from their recommendation that the bishop normally chooses who will go forward to become an official Postulant, which is a Latin word for "asking" or "requesting," in this case, to be a priest. So, on Friday Melissa and I arrived at the retreat center and met with the commission for dinner and introductions and then after a sleepless night, we went before four smaller committees of two to three people each to be interviewed on four different areas. Then lunch, and then we left, however the commission stayed at the retreat center to discuss the participants and to decide those which they would recommend to the bishop and those who they would not. Melissa and I flew home and waited. We waited with eagerness and a little fear too for the arrival of the bishops letter with the news. On Thursday it came. I brought it upstairs and looked at it for a moment before calling Melissa who was at work at the time. "It's here." I said. "Did you open it?" she asked. "No, I wanted to call you first so that you would be on the phone when I opened it." And then I did, and I read the words from Bishop Howe, "Dear Philip: I am happy to report to you that the Commission on Ministry has recommended to me, as a result of the BACAM Conference held on April 13th and 14th, that you continue in the process toward Ordination to the priesthood. I am delighted to accept that recommendation." Woo-hoo! I made it.

The one other piece of news that you should know about is our plans for this summer. One of the steps in the ordination process is to take Clinical Pastoral Education (CPE) which is a program of intensive training, encountering people in crisis within the hospital setting. I had applied, interviewed and been accepted into a summer CPE program this past December, but had turned it down due to financial concerns. However because the Commission on Ministry strongly recommended that I go through the program this summer, even though it is going to be a great faith and financial stretch for Melissa and I, we decided to see what I could do. Upon arriving back in Massachusetts I called the hospital where I was previously accepted. However, as is understandable they had given away the spot which was previously offered to me. So, I called every CPE program within an hour and a half radius as well as Florida (where Melissa's family lives) and Michigan (where my family lives), but was unable to find any openings this late in the game since it is normal to apply, be interviewed and then accepted six months in advance of the beginning of the program. However God is merciful and within a few days I received a call from a hospital which is located about thirty to forty-five minutes from our house with a position that had recently opened. I was interviewed and soon afterward, learned that I had been accepted into the program. So, I'll be spending over forty hours a week throughout this summer meeting with folks in any of the units from intensive care to cardiac, birthing or even a locked psychiatric unit. It is supposed to be a rigorous and often difficult and heart wrenching experience, but also a time of intensive growth. I'm looking forward to ministering to and learning from the many people with whom I'll be meeting as a hospital chaplain.
As you can see from the above, this last month has been a big experience in learning to trust God. He knows what he is doing and has been taking excellent care of us, though sometimes I have trouble seeing this over the looming challenges. Though I occasionally doubt my calling to be a priest when seeming difficulties and challenges arise, God continues to provide and to keep opening the doors and so we continue to move forward. Thank you for all your prayers and encouragements.

Brian

Brian Barry, after kindly purchasing some soda for my wife's upset stomach

Dad

This is my dad and the dog.

March - A Month in the Life of a Seminarian

Greetings all from Massachusetts,
The weather here has been traumatizing lately. Some folks—including my wife—are nearing mental breakdown due to the tantalizing sunshine and sixty degree flirtations, which are here for a day and then followed by the normal slew of snow and ice. Today is another one of those teasing days—though I can see brightness shining through our venation blinds I don’t know what the temperature is since I haven’t been outside yet, but I’m trying not to get my hopes up. Winter, here in Mass is rather like a bad sermon—never ending.

The big news from this past month was our trip to Nashotah House Theological Seminary in Wisconsin. Melissa and I met with Bishop Howe back in December and he had mentioned that he would like us to visit the school and strongly consider studying there for a year. So, the wife and I piled into our car along with our travel pillows some tubes of Pringles, Little Debbie Cakes and a couple of suitcases. Twelve hours later after traversing across the state trooper laden highways of New York and the deserted stretches of Canada we arrived in Detroit, Michigan to slumber on a friend’s couch. The next day we drove to Chicago for dinner with my sister and her husband and a fitful sleep on an over inflated air mattress (Melissa liked it). Finally, on Thursday morning we drove up along Lake Michigan into Wisconsin and arrived at our destination.

Just outside of a quant little town called Delafield—which reminds one of driving through Pleasantville—near wide swaths of farmer’s fields one can find the seminary hiding away from the road on the eastern shore of Nashotah Lake. Melissa said the school reminded her of a retreat center quietly placed amidst towering trees. We arrived in time for the first class of the morning: Ascetical Theology (a class focused on the priesthood and Christian spirituality in ministry; in particular the priest’s role as spiritual guide and confessor) with Father Klukas. While he lectured, students laughed about his stories and jokes concerning the priesthood and tossed in jokes of their own—all of this while scribbling or typing notes concerning the theology of the priesthood. The atmosphere was very different from the serious, overworked tone of the students where Melissa and I currently attend. Throughout the rest of the day at the little school, (about 75 students total) folks warmly greeted us with an outstretched hand and a smiling face. That afternoon I was interviewed by the dean, registrar and a leading member of the faculty, and then after gathering for chapel that afternoon, a couple from the school took us out for supper. Ah, the memories I still have from that rib-eye steak and glass of Valley Of The Moon Sangiovese, though the slice of cucumber that they put in my water was a little weird. The next morning I got up for the daily chapel service and enjoyed the service, though my knees felt like a little kid after his first couple of days learning to rollerblade. The folks at Nashotah like to kneel a lot—with no padding. After attending a few more classes we grabbed some lunch in their cafeteria, thanked everyone at Nashotah for their hospitality and were off on our cross-country journey back to New England. We thoroughly enjoyed our visit to the seminary. We were impressed by the culture—friendly and close knit and unlike Gordon-Conwell, which trains scholars, Nashotah House is forming pastors to serve people. Melissa and I are feeling drawn by God and have been praying quite a bit about a potential move there this fall.

Back at the homestead, I was preaching about the Sabbath a few weeks ago at our local parish. As I was coming to the end of my sermon I said, “There are three ways that we can practice Sabbath in our lives” then I gave the first and the second, but I couldn't think of the third. I went blank and I had just promised to share three ways. This has long been my greatest fear, especially as of late since I have been working on preaching note-less. The normal reaction when you go blank is to review the points of you sermon up until then, with the audience and this gives you time to remember what is next. So, that is what I did, but I still didn’t remember. Nothing. I said, “You know what, I can't remember the third way that we should put this into practice.” Everyone laughed. While they were laughing, the point came to me and I finished the sermon well. Going blank is not so bad. Suffering through my worst fear was a good experience for me.

Blessings,
Philip and Melissa

A Chilly Run

During our youth skiing and snowboarding trip this past January, I persuaded some of the teen guys, including Ralph, who you see in this picture with me, to run in our swimming trunks back from the pool to the condo where we were staying. I think that it was around seven degrees outside that evening. By the time we made it back to the room our hair was frozen! Talk about a rush!

February - A Month in the Life of a Seminarian

Greetings all, from icy Massachusetts. Melissa and I have amazingly made it through all twenty-eight days of February. One day the frozen water was so thick on the car windshield that I might as well have been chipping away at a granite carving with a plastic fork.

A couple of weeks ago we had the excellent opportunity of pet and house-sitting for a family in our church while they went to Antigua for the weekend. The place was huge with fireplaces, a sauna shower, maids that came nearly every day and even an outdoor hot tub that was kept at 104 degrees! If you could bear walking across the icy snow in your bare feet (which we did) the pool of steaming water was waiting to melt you like a marshmallow in hot chocolate. Oh, and I was even allowed to use the Audi—heated seats and all! What a grand little blessing from God for Melissa and me.

However the big news of the month is that on February nineteenth, I boarded a plane and flew to Florida for a rigorous week of meeting with the parish discernment committee from the church that is sponsoring me for the priesthood. The week went well. The structural design of the meetings created an excellent atmosphere for in-depth questioning and discussion of my life and ministry. Though I had known some of the folks on the committee for quite a while, others I met for the first time and so our first assembly consisted of a light evening of conversation, laughter and enjoying a meal together. The second meeting, like the first was an enriching time of relational building as we went around the room and shared our stories, our struggles and triumphs. It was a heart-felt gathering even bringing tears to some, and an eye opener for me to have the privilege of being able to be part of the lives of some wonderful people. There could not have been chosen a finer, more thoughtful and caring group of folks with whom to complete this part of the process toward holy orders. Also during the week I was able to help out with the pancake dinner on Shrove Tuesday and assist in a church workday on Saturday to clean out the attic and I enjoyed getting to better know some of the folks on the committee in a different and less formal setting. The last few meetings involved many questions about my life, calling, gifts, and theology, past ministry experiences, strengths and areas which are in need of improvement. It was a challenging but excellent and extremely beneficial experience.

Now I am back in Massachusetts with my much missed wife. She would have loved to come to Florida with me if she could have obtained the needed time in the midst of school and work commitments. Yet, now we are back together. And so I am back to studying theology and assisting at the church and enjoying the many good people who God has given us as friends here in New England.

January - a month in the Life of a Seminarian

Meeting with the Church in Florida

Greetings, I hope that you had a wonderful Christmas. Melissa and I had an excellent time down in Florida. We were very encouraged in our meetings with a variety of different folks in the diocese. I was able to spend a good amount of time with Father Andrew, who is mentoring me through the discernment process and he was very kind to allow me to preach on the fourth Sunday in Advent. Father Jon Davis, a friend of Melissa's showed us around his church plant in Oviedo and we very excited to learn of all the great things that are happening at the new mission. We also met with Bishop Howe, who strongly urged us to look into Nashotah House Theological Seminary and so we are planning on visiting the seminary toward the end of March. Afterward, Tom Rutherford, our commission on ministry representative, was very kind to take us out to lunch and get to know us. He is a very genuine man and we are grateful to God that he is assisting us with this process.

On the first Sunday after Christmas I was honored to be invited to preach at the parish of Father Al Jenkins, who Melissa and I came to know while we finished up our undergraduate studies at Southeastern University. We also met with Beverly Jennings who, along with her husband is graciously leading the parish discernment committee which will be helping us to determine whether or not we should move forward in the ordination process. The people to whom God has led us to down in Florida have been a tremendous blessing and very encouraging-- especially in this tumultuous time of questioning and searching, making mistakes and trying to discover where God is leading.

 

Fun with Family

We also had a nice time visiting with family. Melissa's sister and her husband generously hosted us and lovingly put up with our hectic holiday schedule. We spent much time going back and forth from house to house seeing Melissa's mother and father, uncles, aunts, cousins and friends, and going to multiple Christmas parties. Attempting to fit months and months worth of family relationships into a couple of short weeks is not a simple task. One of our Christmas gifts was to be able to go and see an amazing indoor display of ice sculptures- something one would not normally expect in sunny Florida. A giant freezer was created inside of a hotel and with a temperature of a mere nine degrees in which we, while shivering, were able to see life size sculptures of people, a train and a breathtaking crystal clear nativity scene along with other stunning works of art. At the very end we climbed up a set of steps made out of ice and slid down an ice slide -which was extremely cold, but great fun.

 

Life in Massachusetts

The day after our return to Massachusetts it was back to seminary classes. I have excellent professors this semester and am thoroughly enjoying my studies, although the pile of work that is growing before me seems overwhelming. Melissa is taking classes at Boston College this semester, as well as at the seminary, and she is looking forward to completing her course work for her master's degree by the end of this summer. This past weekend we took the youth skiing and snowboarding for the weekend. Those few days of swimming, video games, movies, multiple late nights and sore muscles from the slopes were enough to wear out an entire army of youth leaders, however we survived. Near the end of each day we gathered together for Compline and reflection on the workings of God in our day and it was always interesting to hear how the youth saw God working in their lives-from a near death experience on the slopes to another while flying a plane (one of the youth has his flying license) to helping out a fellow skier who had injured himself in a painful fall. On Sunday Father Bart presided over our own Eucharist Service up on the slopes-which was somewhat physically challenging with each of us trying not to slip and slide down the hill during the short service. However it was a peaceful experience surrounded by God's beauty of snow whitened mountains and the voices of a group of young people singing the doxology.

 

Thank you for all of your prayers. Melissa and I would love to hear about what is happening in your life. Feel free to email us.